ASH | Chapter 2

On​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ an October night, the city lights were just coming on.

Soft beams of light spilled from window after window in the buildings, evoking the feeling of home. The tall bauhinia trees surrounding the estate, carefully tended, rustled as the cool breeze swept through them.

I really should have made that damned, arrogant bastard wait all night!

Fei​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Huan’s eyes glinted in the darkness as he glared resentfully at the light spilling from the upstairs window. He lingered downstairs in a sulk for ages, but finally…went upstairs anyway.

He kept cursing himself for lacking resolve.

Ever since he had met Xu Luotao, his life had changed.

He​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ hated Xu Luotao’s arrogance and conceit. He hated everything about him. Yet he could never stop himself from wanting to draw closer, if only for that fleeting sensation when their bodies touched, as though they were surrounded by wisps of ethereal smoke.

His heart was always troubled and confused. Xu Luotao’s possessiveness was astonishing, but…he had never been willing to make any promises.

Bah! Why should I, Fei Huan, care about some lousy promise?

He​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ opened the door with a cold expression. The television in the living room was blaring with noisy, cheerful sounds. Entertainment Panorama was on, a highly popular program.

Bang!

Fei Huan shut the door and glanced at Xu Luotao, who was sitting boredly in the living room, smoking. He was not paying the slightest attention to the television. He stared expressionlessly at the beautiful hostess smiling brightly from the screen.

“Why are you so late?” Xu Luotao asked in a low voice without turning to look at Fei Huan.

Fei​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Huan ignored him and untied the neatly knotted tie around his neck. Xu Luotao suddenly grew restless. He rose and darted over, took the tie from Fei Huan’s hand, and tossed it onto the sofa. With one arm around Fei Huan’s firm, narrow waist, he reached up with the other and carefully undid the buttons of Fei Huan’s shirt.

His long fingers made Fei Huan’s chest itch and ache. It was just like the prelude to their usual pleasure.

Xu Luotao’s greatest virtue was probably his ability to arouse the normally aloof Fei Huan in an instant. No matter how much he hated the man, at times like this he always found him exceptionally charming.

The​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ television’s dull banter and canned laughter seemed to fade away. All Fei Huan could hear was Xu Luotao’s steady, rhythmic breathing, along with that heart-stirring, low laugh.

Fei Huan impatiently twisted his body, seemingly trying to escape Xu Luotao’s feigned attentiveness, in truth teasing fingers. Yet he wrapped his arms around Xu Luotao, who was slightly taller and broader than himself, and suddenly threw himself backward with all his strength. The two of them rolled together onto the specially made, oversized sofa.

“So passionate…” Xu Luotao chuckled. He spread both hands apart and roughly tore Fei Huan’s shirt in two.

Fei​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Huan looked down at his new shirt and sighed. With a carefree gesture, he picked up the scraps of fabric from his body and tossed them onto the floor. Then he grabbed Xu Luotao by the collar and pulled him close to his own face, breathing his sweet scent onto Xu Luotao’s lips. “Hey, you’re paying for that.”

“Paying?” Xu Luotao gave him a wicked smile. “How about I pay with my body?”

“Pay with your body?” Fei Huan arched a brow. “Let me see whether you’ve got the capital.” His nimble hand reached toward Xu Luotao’s lower body and maliciously prodded the bulging, swollen area.

The​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ provocative movement made Xu Luotao shudder. Every muscle in his body tensed, and he immediately pounced on his delicious prey like a carnivore.

Xu Luotao stripped Fei Huan bare in just a few moves. As he worked at the cherries on Fei Huan’s chest, he teased, “You still don’t know what my capital is? Don’t come begging for mercy later.”

“Begging for mercy?” Fei Huan gasped and raised his upper body, deliberately teasing Xu Luotao’s fingers with the skin of his chest. He lifted his chin handsomely. “Dream on.”

“Ah…”

Long​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ fingers intruded into the tightly closed flower gate, and Fei Huan let out an unrestrained, lustful moan.

“Do you like it?” Xu Luotao lowered his head and gently licked the edge of Fei Huan’s lips. His breathing gradually grew heavier. “Watch me leave you half-dead…”

“Get lost! Just because… Ngh… Just because you can?” Fei Huan gasped coquettishly and bit down on Xu Luotao’s lips like a wild cat.

Their​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ tongues tangled, swallowing and chasing…giving rise to wave after wave of lewd sounds.

Xu Luotao maliciously toyed with Fei Huan’s desire, making the handsome young man, whose eyes had softened with spring, twist and turn in his hands.

“Fei Huan, use your mouth.”

“No!”

“It​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ would be a shame not to use such a beautiful mouth.” Xu Luotao skillfully teased the body burning so hot it seemed ready to melt, while the fingers of his other hand slipped into Fei Huan’s elegant lips and stirred.

Fei Huan’s smiling eyes shot Xu Luotao a sideways glance. Then his teeth suddenly clenched.

“Ah!” Xu Luotao hurriedly pulled out his aching fingers and said angrily, “Why are you so difficult? Everyone else is willing, but you have to be special.”

“Everyone​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ else?” Fei Huan repeated dangerously, narrowing his eyes. His face darkened, and he kicked the unsuspecting Xu Luotao off the sofa.

Fei Huan had known from an early age that he was inclined that way, but he had always coldly rejected anyone who pursued him. In truth, Xu Luotao was his only sexual partner. Even though he had long known Xu Luotao was a shameless, lecherous bastard, how could he not fly into a rage when he heard something like that in the middle of sex?

“You!…” Kicked to the floor without mercy, Xu Luotao’s neck swelled thick with rage. He clenched his fists and nearly lunged forward to snap Fei Huan’s neck. Then, as though he had thought of something, his eyes shifted. He suppressed his anger and smiled instead. “Are you jealous?”

“Jealous?​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ I’m not as promiscuous as you! What do you take me for?”

“What do I take you for?” Xu Luotao wore that infuriatingly strange smile and asked in return, “What do you want me to take you for?”

You pig!

His​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ heart felt unbearably sour. As he watched the tall, handsome man grin shamelessly before him, Fei Huan’s chest began to rise and fall more violently.

Seeing Fei Huan’s unwavering stare, Xu Luotao climbed to his feet smugly, pulled out a cigarette from the table, and placed it between his lips.

Too angry to speak, Fei Huan slid off the sofa, got to his feet, and walked toward the bathroom.

The​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ moment he shut the bathroom door, he heard Xu Luotao begin making a phone call. Fei Huan bit his lower lip and pressed himself against the door to listen.

“Xiaobin, I’m coming over tonight.” Xu Luotao spoke loudly, not at all afraid of Fei Huan hearing him. He laughed suggestively. “Remember to spray on the perfume I like and wait for me in bed.”

Whoosh! Bang!

Xu​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Luotao ended the call with a smile and looked impassively toward Fei Huan, who had flung open the door.

Meeting those clear, dazing eyes, Xu Luotao lightly patted Fei Huan’s face, flushed crimson with anger.

“Baby, wait for my call.”

Rage​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ burned through every nerve.

“Get the hell out!” Fei Huan knocked Xu Luotao’s hand away and pointed toward the living-room door as he shouted.

Xu Luotao looked at Fei Huan’s reaction with interest, then turned and walked toward the entrance.

“If​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ you miss me, then…” He turned around at the door, intending to leave one last arrogant remark, but a vase came flying across the room at high speed, forcing him to dodge.

!!

The vase missed its target and smashed against the wall behind Xu Luotao, shattering into pieces.

What a difficult little wildcat.

Seeing​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Fei Huan’s furious reaction, Xu Luotao had to admit that he felt a wicked pleasure in that moment.

Cold, aloof Fei Huan, Fei Huan who sneered at every admirer, had thrown a vase at me like a jealous wife.

With the corners of his lips raised, Xu Luotao clicked his tongue twice regretfully at the shards by his feet. Then he retreated like a gentleman, cast one fond glance at Fei Huan’s furious, beautiful face, and considerately closed the door for him.

Click!

The​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ door swung shut softly, cutting Fei Huan and Xu Luotao off from each other’s sight.

The apartment immediately fell silent. The television’s voice suddenly became unbearably loud.

Fei Huan stared blankly at the door for a while. Then he cursed under his breath, turned, and retreated into the bathroom, leaning against the door in a daze.

Dammit,​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ dammit, dammit!

I want you to want only me. I want to be the only one you want!

Fei Huan knew he should not be so jealous, but it was beyond his control. Gay men were always fond of constantly changing partners, and Xu Luotao was the very best of them, no, he did not just like men. He did not spare women either. As long as someone caught his interest, he had never been willing to restrain himself.

Why​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ was he hiding in the bathroom and crying like some pitiful abandoned wife?

Fei Huan despised himself for being this way.

He had only been sleeping with Xu Luotao for a few days, yet he was already unable to leave him. Perhaps it was simply because Xu Luotao was his first. Would finding a few more partners solve this vexing problem?

Fei​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Huan frowned as he considered the possibility.

The entire night was agonizing. Fei Huan spent it with his handsome brows tightly furrowed, thinking about the matter.

How did I end up like some woman ready to kill herself over a man?

It​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ was all Xu Luotao’s fault! All of it!

Over the next few days, Fei Huan was utterly miserable.

He sat blank-faced in the office, impatiently fending off every colleague who asked whether something was on his mind. He became so violent with the suspects under interrogation that Xiao Shao and the others had to drag him out of the interrogation room several times…

It​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ was all because of his phone, no, because of Xu Luotao!

Whenever his phone rang, he hurriedly pulled it out, eagerly checking the caller ID. But every time, he was so disappointed that he wanted to smash the phone against the wall opposite him.

I miss him. I miss him so much…

Gnashing​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ his teeth in hatred, Fei Huan asked himself a million times what was so good about Xu Luotao.

He could not find an answer.

The noisy police-station cafeteria was packed with people, and the din was deafening as everyone craned their necks in search of seats.

But​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ no one dared approach Fei Huan, whose fearsome reputation had spread far and wide and who had been surrounded by an intense low-pressure atmosphere for the past few days. Even so…there were still plenty of people willing to sit nearby and admire his beauty.

The cold, irritable handsome man seemed especially popular that year. An attractive, aloof man who had earned one major achievement after another within less than a year of joining the narcotics task force was particularly enough to make people scream.

Fei Huan sat at the table with an ominous expression, utterly unaware of the admiring gazes directed at him. He stared coldly at the coffee before him, as though he and the miserable cup of coffee bearing the brunt of his resentful glare had a bitter feud.

Tong​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Ping and Xiao Shao approached with their coffees, laughing and joking, and sat down beside Fei Huan.

“Your coffee’s about to catch fire,” Xiao Shao said with a sigh as he moved the coffee out of Fei Huan’s line of sight.

Fei Huan gave him a cool glance and moved the coffee back in front of himself.

“Someone’s​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ been dumped, so be careful not to get caught in the backlash.” Tong Ping fanned the flames lazily, earning a murderous glare.

Beep beep beep…

The phone rang.

Fei​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Huan’s whole body jolted. He hurriedly pulled it out to look.

A familiar number!

Although he had warned himself repeatedly not to pay any attention to that heartless, shameless bastard, a sweet smile nevertheless appeared at the corners of his lips.

Ignoring​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ the two curious men beside him, Fei Huan grabbed his phone and rushed outside.

Xiao Shao and Tong Ping of course knew about Fei Huan’s orientation. They exchanged a glance and sighed deeply, then shook their heads toward the direction Fei Huan had gone.

Sigh… So even the coolest person could be captured by love so easily.

Fei​‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‍‌‌‍‌‌‌‍‍‌‍‌‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‍​ Huan, loving this seriously is going to bring you nothing but trouble.